Ah, wax. Where would we be with a nice coat of this lubricating material to enforce the submission of ledge and edges the world over? We’ll tell you where – stuck doing stationary pivot tricks, or flinging our fragile bodies into the ground as a result of trying to grind the ungrindable.

Whilst the oft-repeated skateboard maxim that, ‘if you want it to grind, just go faster’ certainly holds weight in certain situations, there’s absolutely no shame in expediting the process with a nice coating of wax which, once worn in, can guarantee a reliable grind or slide on virtually any material.

“does the capsule pill shape refer to the self-medication of skateboarders the world over, or is it an oblique nod to Big Pharma’s dread hold over the minds of America’s medicated?”

In typically idiosyncratic fashion, Alien Workshop’s approach to skate wax comes with a suggestion of menace: does the capsule pill shape refer to the self-medication of skateboarders the world over, or is it an oblique nod to Big Pharma’s dread hold over the minds of America’s medicated?

Does the fact that this Alien Workshop Prescription Pill Skateboard Wax comes in both a blue and red version imply a reference to The Matrix and Neo’s choice between taking the blue pill for continued numb contentment, or taking the red pill to wake from an imposed hibernation and face the grim reality of a world where humans are little more than farm animals in a dystopian nightmare?

Is the red wax better for front crooks? Is the blue wax better for lipslides?

My God…I don’t think we’ll ever know and maybe, just maybe, it’s better that way.

Regardless of the political and moral connotations of the choice of pill shape, Alien Workshop’s Prescription Skateboard Wax serves up a 5.75” long, 2” wide chunk of functional skate wax that ought to last even the most unrepentant wax fiends at least a year of skating. Complete with faux pharmaceutical labeling and branded Workshop alien figure, this is as Alien Workshop as it comes and carries the extra benefit of being highly likely to confuse any pedestrians that see you waxing ledges with it.

• ALIEN WORKSHOP – PILL WAX
• RRP: £4.95
• ALIENWORKSHOP.COM