Skatepark building in the UK has come on leaps and bounds in the last fifteen years. The 90s saw a wide array of council monstrosities, concrete dog eggs and splintered deathtraps pop up across the land, offering young skateboarders everywhere the chance to remember that no, they weren't in California. While the creation of parks such as Crawley, Cantelowes and particularly Saffron Walden spurred councils across the country to step their game up and not just throw money at some local cowboy builders who know as much about skateboarding as I do about quantum physics, some of these relics of the wilderness years still exist, a testament to clueless box tickers and dodgy builders creating a perfect storm of utter shite.

As grim as these parks clearly are, we are aiming to highlight their crapness in a (semi) affectionate way - there has to be something to be said for a skatepark that's harder to skate than any other spot in your town, and anything is fun with the right crew. These are part of our skate heritage so grab a tinny, scroll through, marvel at what someone at some point considered to be a genuine community facility and feel free to forward your own examples or tag us in on Instagram @sidewalkmag using the hashtag #somebodycallnyjah

This one comes courtesy of Martyn Hill - while the rest of the park was stolen and sold for scrap, the mega ramp remains...

shit park from martyn Concrete Dog Eggs

From @mitchhyy - no platform, no flat bottom, just two metal quarters jutting from the woodland floor like depressingly shit dinosaur bones.

uk park mitchhyy Concrete Dog Eggs

Courtesy of @ed_oaks, a leafy boredom zone.

milborne port village ed_oaks Concrete Dog Eggs

From @stillsfam. At least there's plenty of flat ground I suppose, just not that much in the way of skatepark...

Filwood skatepark stillsfam Concrete Dog Eggs

Pett Skatepark, near Rye. What you can't see here are the unusual skatepark obstacle choices of goalposts and a basketball net. Stinking.

Pett Skatepark Concrete Dog Eggs

A visual feast from Nunroyd Park, Yeadon, which looks more like a piece of conceptual art than anything you'd want to skate.

Nunroyd 4 Concrete Dog Eggs

Inverness, taken by Matthew Smith. More useful to seagulls than to skateboarders!

inverness mattjew89 matthew smith
Shit Park holton le clay Jay Beatty Concrete Dog Eggs

Saving the "best" for last - yep, that's a skatepark. In Holton-le-Clay to be exact, as captured in all its glory by @jay_beatty.

Shit Park holton le clay Jay Beatty Concrete Dog Eggs